The Essence of Splat

Cosas que he aprendido en Perú

or

Things that I have learned in Peru:

1. Don't do ANYTHING between 1:00pm and 3:00pm. It's just WAY too hot.

2. Don't assume that pedestrians have the right of way. You will go splat.

3. Don't eat the skin off of any fruit or vegetable or drink tap water. You will get the splats.

4. Do eat the mangoes and limes. They are both delicious.

5. Don't wear nice shoes to the market. You will get any version of splat on them.

6. Don't be afraid to barter. They will respect you more.

7. Do say hello to everyone you see. After all, they're already staring at you.

8. Don't respond in any way when someone whistles or cat calls at you. Withold your inner feminist.

9. Don't throw your toilet paper in the toilet but into the trash barrel. You will clog the toilet.

10. Do bring a roll of your own toilet paper everywhere you go. It's hard to come by.

11. Don't expect that the people you need to talk to will be there. They like to vacation.

12. Don't ask anyone how old they are. It's rude.

13. Don't try to download YouTube videos. It will take an hour for 20 seconds.

14. Don't be surprised to hear Gangham Style everywhere... all the time.

15. Don't overthink the sign of peace at mass. It will always be awkward.

16. Don't think about the fully intact chicken feet in your soup.

17. Do enjoy all of the potatoes that they feed you. Nom nom nom.

18. Don't leave your pet chickens, turkeys, or ducks unattended. Their feet will be bound, they will be plucked, gutted, chopped up, and fed to you for lunch or dinner.

19. Don't be alarmed when you see a man riding his bicycle down the street with two live ducks hanging from each handlebar.

20. Don't question what the street dogs are eating. You do not want to know.

21. Do enjoy the stars at night. They are different here.

22. Do watch the direction that the toilet flushes. It's different here.

Today we move in with our host families and my internet connection will be limited. Just as the exciting things start I will have limited time and resources to tell you of them! Alas, I'm excited to get going. Everybody send thoughts and prayers to my family as my dad had a little accident at home. Mom & Dad: love you guys so much!